This is the sixth of eight excerpts we are offering from Lauren Rosenberg鈥檚 , a volume in the CCCC Studies in Writing and Rhetoric Series. We’ll be offering a new excerpt each Monday. In this book, Dr. Rosenberg shares the literacy experiences of four learners who attended the Read/Write/Now Adult Learning Center, a library-based informal education site in Springfield, Massachusetts.
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鈥淎re we guinea pigs?鈥�
I鈥檝e just given a simple explanation of who I am and why I鈥檓 there, but rebuts my introduction to his class. I argue a weak 鈥渘o,鈥� (Melissa [his teacher] looks at me quizzically, as if to ask, how are you going to respond to that one?), but George鈥檚 remark has already said it: I don鈥檛 believe you, white lady. . . .
When I approached the people I hoped to work with as case study participants, the two women responded immediately with excitement, asking when we would begin. , though less enthusiastic initially, said okay, it would be fine. But George, who I assumed would be willing, even forthcoming, would not make eye contact. What would he have to do, he wanted to know?
Meet with me to talk about your writing.
鈥淎re you going to take pictures?鈥�
No, I鈥檓 just going to talk with you, no pictures. And, I鈥檓 going to make a copy of all your writing.
鈥淚t鈥檚 not any good.鈥�
It doesn鈥檛 have to be good. I鈥檓 just going to talk to you about your writing.
鈥淚鈥檒l have to think about it. I鈥檒l let you know.鈥�
How could this be? George鈥檚 reluctance forced me to confront myself鈥攚hite, younger, literate, female鈥攁nd guess at how he might rank these categories. I figured that literate trumped the others, but I worried over the way I was presenting myself to him. When I spoke with Pamela, the program coordinator, she told me it was none of that. George doesn鈥檛 want his picture taken. He doesn鈥檛 want people to see that he goes to a literacy center. He is afraid of being evaluated. It had taken him years to trust Melissa and her. And you should see how he used to resist writing. For his first few years in the program, George wouldn鈥檛 write anything. Melissa was adamant that it would be good for him to have to discuss his writing with me. So she spoke with George, he said yes, and we moved ahead, but cautiously. I was so careful preparing for George鈥檚 interview and interacting with him at the center. I wanted to do all the right things to show I was an ethical researcher who respected him. Over time I would come to understand that his frequent displays of reluctance were a performance; that he was, in fact, preoccupied with how he would appear in public, as Pamela had claimed. But at that moment, I tried to compensate for his unwillingness, as well as my own anxiety that he would show up at the interview and refuse to speak, by completely rewriting my questions to suit him. I softened them. 鈥淗ow can I draw him out so he won鈥檛 quit?鈥� I asked myself again and again as I prepared for our meeting.
We are alone in the library. George asks me whether I will be publishing the interview in the newspaper. No, I assure him, nothing in the news and no photos of him, ever. He likes going over the consent form; it relaxes him a bit. I ask the first questions: 鈥淒id you attend school? Where? When?鈥� George launches into the entire story of his education, his lack of schooling, coping with nonliteracy throughout his life, his desire to get an education in recent years. He speaks with hardly a pause for one hour, and then, 鈥淲ell, I guess I gotta go now,鈥� and we are done.
All eight of our excerpts from this book will be added .